so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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