He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
