so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize