I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
