Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize