You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
