i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
