yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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