Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Thank you for not boning my boss.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
