But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
