Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
