Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Are these your boobs on my camera?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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