So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Everything about him screamed your future.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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