okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
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