plz talk dirty to me
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
