Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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