my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
