Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
