Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I love you. Go after that dick
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
