Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
