ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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