I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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