Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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