Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I've blown a few things in my day
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
tell me about the fingering
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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