Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
