My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize