so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
it was like eating out sand paper
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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