There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
She's the barista slut.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I am available for nakedness
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
