How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
