there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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