we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The struggles of a small town man whore
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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