Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Someone signed my nipple.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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