You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
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