You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
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