we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
