Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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