The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
