I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
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