Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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