In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
