Dual....:-)
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
