This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
