Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
