Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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