I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
