i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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