"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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