I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
