even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
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