What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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